Bible accounts of Isaac-Rebekah interactions provide a lesson on transparent husband-wife honor and support for family leadership. Rebekah honored and supported Isaac’s overall leadership but did not expect him to honor her occasional leadership of specific family affairs. Therefore, she relied on bridging over potential disputes to perform her family leadership responsibilities. In one example, she took advantage of Isaac’s failing sight to redirect him to bless their younger son Jacob instead of older son Esau for family inheritance. In another example, she presented a concern they shared regarding marriage to convince Isaac to relocate Jacob but did not present her other concern that Esau was planning to kill Jacob. Their interactions highlight the need for a husband-wife union to expect and receive honor and support for each other’s contribution to family leadership. The accounts provide additional evidence that God uses the family leadership structure to communicate his will to the family.
Isaac-Rebekah Individual Responsibility Honor-Support Family Leadership 24:48
This discussion of Isaac-Rebekah interactions continues the bible study series on understanding the individual responsibility regarding family leadership. The series is based on bible examples of husband-wife interactions and relationships. Previous studies in the series led to understanding a family leadership structure with the husband as overall leader and the wife as spiritual gateway and occasional leader in specific matters. Also, the previous studies led to understanding that God uses the family leadership structure to communicate his will to the family and calls on the husband-wife union to honor and support each other’s contributions to family leadership. He blesses those that do.
The bible account of the separation of Ishmael from Isaac provides four lessons toward understanding the individual responsibility in family leadership. First, after recognizing the need for the separation, Sarah honored Abraham’s overall leadership by asking him to send Ishmael and his mother away. Abraham honored Sarah’s leadership of the specific matter by taking her demand seriously and seeking God’s guidance toward resolving his personal conflict regarding the demand. Second, God’s guidance to Abraham provides a conflict resolution strategy of focusing on the underlying concerns regarding a dispute. Third, Abraham’s response illustrates quick and permanent resolution of a potentially dividing husband-wife disagreement, to preserve their unity before God. Fourth, the separation highlights selective development of family opportunities: based on selecting the opportunities to develop and those to abandon, delay, or de-emphasize; in order to focus better on the selected opportunities.
Abraham-Sarah vs Ishmael: Individual Responsibility Regarding Family Leadership 13:44
We continue the bible study series toward understanding the individual responsibility regarding family leadership, based on bible examples of husband-wife interactions and relationships. Previous studies in the series led to understanding the husband as overall leader of the household and the wife as spiritual gateway of the family and occasional leader in specific matters. Both husband and wife are individually responsible to honor and support family leadership. The family will benefit greatly if they do.
We learn several lessons from Abraham-Sarah interactions in the separation of Ishmael from Isaac: Quick and permanent resolution of a potentially dividing husband-wife disagreement to remain united as one before God; conflict resolution strategy based on understanding and addressing the underlying concerns in a conflict; and opportunity selection based on remaining connected to God to receive guidance regarding opportunities that one may de-emphasize in order to focus on proper development of other opportunities.
CLICK PICTURE TO PLAY VIDEO
We discuss Abraham-Sarah interactions regarding Ishmael to learn about resolving a potentially dividing husband-wife disagreement quickly and permanently. Also, the interactions help us understand that certain things or opportunities that are important to us may at times need to be de-emphasized or abandoned in order to make room for proper development of other opportunities.
Sarah gave birth to Isaac, a son with husband Abraham in their old age, fulfilling God’s promise: “… Sarah your wife shall bear you a son, and you shall call his name Isaac; I will establish My covenant with him for an everlasting covenant, and with his descendants after him” [Genesis 17:19]. Therefore, Isaac was the child of promise: God’s promise to Abraham-Sarah will be fulfilled through Isaac’s offspring. However, Abraham with Sarah’s approval had fathered a child Ishmael with Sarah’s maid-servant Hagar. He loved Ishmael, felt a responsibility for him, and maybe wondered about Ishmael’s rightful inheritance as his son.
During a feast to celebrate Isaac’s weaning, Sarah noticed Ishmael display apparent hostility toward Isaac: “And Sarah saw the son of Hagar the Egyptian, whom she had borne to Abraham, scoffing” [Genesis 21:9]. She recognized the behavior as a sign of potential future threat to Isaac growing up in the presence of Ishmael. Therefore, she demanded Ishmael and his mother be expelled from the household to protect Isaac: “Cast out this bondwoman and her son; for the son of this bondwoman shall not be heir with my son, namely with Isaac” [Genesis 21:10].
Hagar and Ishmael wikipedia.org
Her demand troubled Abraham greatly: “And the matter was very displeasing in Abraham’s sight because of his son” [Genesis 21:11]. He likely was sympathetic to Sarah’s demand but felt an internal conflict with throwing out his son because of a sense of responsibility and concern for his well being. God intervened: He directed Abraham to accept his wife’s demand and resolved his internal conflict by explaining that he will bless each of the two children separately [Genesis 21:12–13]: “But God said to him, ‘Do not be so distressed about the boy and your slave woman. Listen to whatever Sarah tells you, because it is through Isaac that your offspring will be reckoned. I will make the son of the slave into a nation also, because he is your offspring.’”
We learn several lessons through these events. First, we learn an important conflict resolution strategy through God’s resolution of Abraham’s internal conflict. Second, we discuss the urgency of his intervention and the resolution he provided to underscore the need for quick and permanent resolution of any potentially dividing husband-wife disagreement. Third, the separation of Ishmael from Isaac provides a lesson on opportunity selection—recognizing available opportunities that may need to be de-emphasized or abandoned in order to make room for proper development of other opportunities.
Bridging Over Potential Dispute
Lessons from Isaac-Rebekah Interactions
Rebekah avoided potential dispute with husband Isaac while getting him to implement a course of action she believed in for their family. In one case, she redirected him to implement God’s instruction regarding relationships among their children by taking advantage of his failing site. In another case, she secured Isaac’s approval of Jacob fleeing to Haran, using a concern they shared to bridge over potential disagreement regarding her immediate concern of fratricide among their children.
CLICK PICTURE TO PLAY VIDEO
Interactions between Isaac and Rebekah indicate unwavering commitment to their marriage and acceptance of Isaac as leader in family affairs. Evidence for their marital commitment arises from the fact they lived for twenty years without a child but did not seek alternative solutions to childlessness. Instead, they prayed and believed God will give them children through the marriage. He did. Regarding the acceptance of Isaac as family leader, the evidence can be derived from two key events that we discuss in more detail presently.
Sent away to survive and prosper Sweet Publishing freebibleimages.org
However, in contrast with what we learned from the Shunammite couple, where family leadership was shared between the man and his wife through an informal division of responsibilities, Isaac’s leadership of family affairs appears total and unyielding with little if any room for Rebekah’s choice. His style of family leadership, though probably in keeping with customary practice, resulted in the unpleasant situation of his wife Rebekah deceiving him in order to implement an instruction from God regarding important family relationships. Additionally, at least one other significant event in their life shows Rebekah concealing a point of disagreement from her husband in order to arrive at a resolution acceptable to both of them. She bridged over potential dispute by focusing on a concern they shared.
We can learn from Isaac-Rebekah interactions that God may assign to a husband or his wife the responsibility to lead an aspect of family life. For example, as we discuss in more detail presently, God assigned to Rebekah the responsibility to safeguard and see to the implementation of his choice for the propagation of family inheritance.
Irrespective of whether God calls the husband or his wife, the guiding principles are the same. As we discuss in a previous bible study under Right Heart for Strategic Alliance, God expects the husband and wife to work together to accomplish the assigned objectives.
The Shunammite Couple lived according to this principle as we saw in a previous study. They shared family leadership amicably and assisted each other to accomplish family goals. God blessed them abundantly. In contrast, Isaac-Rebekah interactions provide an example of potential dispute due to unyielding family leadership by the husband. However, Rebekah devised ways to bridge over the potential dispute. In one case, she redirected her husband to implement God’s instruction regarding relationships among their children, by taking advantage of his failing site. In another, she secured Isaac’s approval of Jacob fleeing to Haran by presenting a concern they shared, thus bridging over potential disagreement regarding possible fratricide among their children
This bible study focuses on the family of Isaac and Rebekah during the early years of Jacob and Esau. Their interactions remind us that children need parental blessing, through a parent fulfilling obligations to the child or responding to motivation due to a child’s good behavior. Parental blessing based on obligation alone may be less effective than blessing that is also motivated by a parent feeling good about the child. Therefore, children need to be good to their parents and should not rely on parental obligation alone to earn parental blessing.
