A marriage arranged to serve extraneous interests likely will be unsuccessful and bring no benefit to the couple. Example: David-Michal marriage was motivated by interests different from any desire by the couple to live in marital love. Michal’s father Saul sought the marriage to lure David into danger. David embraced the marriage to show military valor and triumph over Philistines. Michal, on her part, was infatuated with being the king’s wife. Furthermore, while David believed in life founded on worshiping and serving God, Michal had no such belief or understanding. They were unequally yoked before God; therefore, incompatible for marriage.
We discuss David-Michal marital interactions to learn from their experience. Their marriage was driven by inappropriate motivations, got off on the wrong foot, and ended without discernible benefit to them individually or as a couple. We study negatives from their marriage to enrich our understanding of positive aspects of modern day marriages.
Michal’s father, Saul, the first king of Israel, lobbied hard to persuade David to marry Michal, because he wanted to use the marriage to lure David to death to eliminate him from contending for the throne of Israel. Michal, on her part, appeared to love David. However, later events showed that all she really cared about was getting married to a young man that was highly admired among her contemporaries and expected to become the king of Israel sometime later. She was in love with the prospect of such a marriage but did not know or understand David enough to care about him as a potential husband. David apparently got into the marriage to show himself equal to the challenge for a gruesome conquest and mutilation of several Philistines, the then number one enemy of Israel. He cherished his “prize” for the valiant victory, brought to life through marriage to Michal, but did not love or care about her as a wife.
David-Michal marriage, therefore, was arranged to satisfy interests totally extraneous to the marital interest of David and Michal. The marriage was driven by inappropriate motivation. In this study, we discuss events leading to David-Michal marriage to understand the marriage got off on the wrong foot because of inappropriate motivation. Also, we note that David and Michal separated for a long time and re-united thereafter. We discuss the separation and re-unification to underscore their lack of personal commitment either to their marriage or to each other. Further, we discuss a specific event that brought their mutual dismay to the surface. We use information from the event to understand their marriage was unsuccessful because they were unequally yoked before God and, therefore, incompatible for marriage.
How do you respond to a rejection of your offer of service? What determines the offer has been rejected or you need another attempt at getting it accepted? The service could be delivering the gospel, training a subordinate business associate that presents himself or herself as untrainable, parental training of a child that has proved to be non malleable, or other examples. As these examples indicate, responding to rejection requires first a decision, maybe often a difficult decision, that one’s effort at performing the service has been rejected. The bible provides clear instruction on how to respond, having determined that rejection has occurred. It also provides guidance on what needs to be done before declaring a rejection. However, a decision to declare rejection will likely always be difficult, because accepting rejection is equivalent to accepting failure of an effort. We discuss examples of declaring and accepting rejection by the apostle Paul, Christ’s teaching on responding to rejection, and God’s guidance through Prophet Ezekiel on what one needs to do before declaring a rejection.
When Philistines defeated Israel in the battle at Mt. Gilboa and killed the Israeli king Saul and his son Jonathan, David mourned Saul, Jonathan, the Israeli army, and the house of Israel. In this study, we examine why he mourned. While his mourning for Saul was intended to honor and show respect, his mourning for Jonathan was an expression of sadness and regret for an unexpected loss of life. In contrast, we find that his mourning for the Israeli army and house of Israel goes beyond grieving or lamenting for the dead and invokes spiritual mourning such as mentioned in “Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted [Matthew 5:4].”
After David left Saul’s service, Saul went after him to hunt him down and kill him, because he saw David as a threat to continuation of his kingdom. David, with a team of about 400 men, moved frequently to evade Saul. Twice he had good opportunity to kill Saul but did not kill him because of his great respect for Saul as God’s anointed king of Israel.
After David left Saul’s service, he set out to build a team to protect him from Saul. He needed people, food and supplies, and weapon. He was joined initially by a group of four hundred men that needed relief under Saul’s administration. They would be unreachable to Saul’s people by teaming with David and at the same time help protect David by building a team around him. David’s relationship with this group illustrates an important principle of team building.
How Should a Master and an Innovative Subordinate Relate? Interactions between Saul and David after David killed Goliath indicate useful answers. David remained in Saul’s service after killing Goliath and was threatened by Saul because Saul was jealous and afraid of him. Saul was jealous of David because he killed Goliath and led Israel to victory over the Philistines at a time that Saul, the king, was visibly too frightened to try. He was afraid of David because God was with David and had left Saul, and David was successful and impressed the people of Israel in everything he did. Therefore, Saul, the master, felt out-performed by his subordinate, David, and reacted by threatening to kill him.
God rejected Saul as king over Israel because he disobeyed God by selectively performing only aspects of God’s instruction while doing as he liked regarding the others. After God rejected Saul’s kingship, he directed Samuel to seek out a son of Jesse and anoint him king.